Thursday, September 11, 2014

Sometimes my heart hurts...

Sometimes my heart hurts. I read what some of my students write and I want to scoop them up and tell them that they are worthy, smart, kind. Sometimes I see a student who seems to put together, then writes something sad and I remember. I remember what high school was like for me, I remember how teachers didn't see me. I remember days when it felt like no one saw me. It hurts, but then I get angry and inspired. I strive to be the teacher who sees her students, even when it is annoying to them. I strive to be the teacher who hears the sadness and struggles to show students that there is greatness in them.

It is the 13th Anniversary of 9/11 today. I had my creative writing class respond to a poem written by a man whose brother should have been in the Twin Towers but survived. I then had them write a poem that would be their last message to a loved one. Finally, I asked them to write their own Eulogies. I know, super depressing. It was interesting to have them think about these seemingly outlandish situations. It was also interesting to hear their responses.

All of my students directed their "last words poem" towards a parent. Some expressed gratitude, some forgiveness, others regret. One student, who I have only known for a short time but seems to be one of the most kind students I have ever come across, wrote about how sorry they were to be a disappointment to their parent. This made my heart hurt because this student is so kind, smart, helpful and generous. I had a student express forgiveness towards a parent who was not there for them. How sad that children must not only grow into a world that is unforgiving, but have parents who fail them.

I have students who drive me crazy. Today, a small group of students made me check myself. These wonderful creatures are so tough. They can withstand far more than we give them credit for. They shouldn't have to. We should not teach them simple survival, we need to teach them how to thrive in this world. How to make this world a better place, instead of allowing an increase in awfulness.

On this day of remembrance, I remember how I felt on 9/11. I remember the innocence I felt prior to that fateful day; then I see some of the innocence and hope reflected in my students' eyes. Let us get that hope back, let us all strive to improve this world and our role in it.

Okay...sorry to be so preachy. I just wanted to get out my initial reactions to reading my students' writing on this topic. Thanks everyone. As always, please comment.

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